After Natalie Portman shuts down Moby’s relationship claim, women speak out about their experiences
You've probably seen a bit of the back and forth between actress Natalie Portman and musician Moby.
First, Moby claimed in his new book that the two dated for a brief time when he was 33 and she was 20. He shared intimate details of their fleeting romance and used it to explain some of his insecurities at the time.
Well, Portman fired right back, claiming she was 18 at the time and that the two never really dated at all.
While the Oscar winner, now 37, said she was a fan of his music and his friend, she also told Harper's Bazaar, "I was surprised to hear that he characterized the very short time that I knew him as dating because my recollection is a much older man being creepy with me when I just had graduated high school.”
She certainly wasn't pulling any punches there.
“He said I was 20; I definitely wasn’t. I was a teenager. I had just turned 18. There was no fact checking from him or his publisher – it almost feels deliberate," she added. "That he used this story to sell his book was very disturbing to me. It wasn’t the case. There are many factual errors and inventions. I would have liked him or his publisher to reach out to fact check.”
Moby, 53, responded to Portman and the online backlash.
"I recently read a gossip piece wherein Natalie Portman said that we’d never dated. This confused me, as we did, in fact, date. And after briefly dating in 1999 we remained friends for years. I like Natalie, and I respect her intelligence and activism. But, to be honest, I can’t figure out why she would actively misrepresent the truth," he wrote on Instagram.
Several Instragram users called Moby's own post "gross" and "creepy."
The fact that Portman spoke out about what she believed to be an older man preying on her at a very young age is something other women have taken to heart.
Comedian and author Lane Moore wrote, "Here’s the thing about Natalie Portman & Moby. Even if she had 'dated' him, she was 18, he was 34. I 'dated' 23 year olds when I was 14. I look back now & realize that was NOT dating & was older men being predatory. She isnt faking memory loss. She just finally realized the truth."
After someone came to Moby's defense, she added, "A guy in this thread said it doesnt count as predatory behavior bc Natalie Portman wasnt like 'most' 18-year-olds because she was about to go to Harvard. this is literally an abuse tactic. older men telling very young girls they're 'mature/smarter' to normalize the behavior."
Many thanked Moore for her perspective.
A woman in Moore's thread added, "Really bummed about the men who have done this to me in my life, even in my professional career. I’ve been told I’m special, etc. and it’s so incredibly depressing."
A film critic prompted other women to speak out about how many times "have you faked having a boyfriend, or said you'd 'met someone else' to stop a guy trying it on or harassing you?"
Several women responded in kind.
"I was usually called in to be the aggressive GF when my femme friends were being harassed," one woman wrote, while another added, "Too many to count" and yet another wrote, "When I was 18 I would say I’m 16 just for old men to back off."
Other women spoke up about how older men use friendships as a ploy.
"When I was actually 16 (and if anything I might have looked younger) some 30-something dude in my town wanted to be 'friends' with me. Hard pass," one wrote.
The stories go on and on.
An artist summed it up well when she wrote, "Dudes write about themselves from the point of view of some dream like world in which they is adored, in truth he was being trash & a creep to someone newly out of high school. Yuck."
As with #MeToo and other social media movements, the comments online have universally slammed predatory behavior toward young women and men.
"'I was a bald binge drinker and Natalie Portman was a beautiful movie star. But here she was in my dressing room, flirting with me. I was 33 and she was 20 but this was her world.' It's gross how Moby thinks he can frame an 18 year old girl (NOT 20) as the one with all the power," one person tweeted. "He also says he 'tried to be her boyfriend', which suggests an awareness that she wasn't interested. You don't 'try' to date somebody who's into you."
Another man added, "Moby was 34 in 1999. Natalie Portman was 18. Imagine going on social media to convince everyone that you, the 34 year old, dated the 18 year old. And being really proud of it."
