"Citadel," a sexy thrill ride now on Prime Video, had me from episode one, scene one. Gorgeous Priyanka Chopra Jonas, in a red dress to match her lips, sashays in heels onto a speeding train and links up with a fellow spy, played with smarts and sizzle by Richard "Bodyguard" Madden.
Their mission is to retrieve the X case, containing the codes for every nuclear weapon in the world. Sounds serious. But even global annihilation takes a backseat to the erotic sparks coming off the two stars, even as they punch, stab and shoot their way through a dirty dozen of bad guys before an explosion blows the train off the tracks, and our spies with them.
Are you ready for the biggest, baddest, budget-burning global spy series in, like, ever? Then check out "Citadel," and watch Madden and Chopra Jonas energize six breathless one-hour episodes that reportedly broke the bank at $300 million. Eat your heart out, James Bond.
"Citadel," just renewed for season 2, isn't just a series, it's an industrial entertainment complex. Produced by the Russo brothers -- the blockbuster maestros behind "Avengers: Endgame" and "Avengers: Infinity War" -- "Citadel" has already set up spin-offs with different stars, different languages and settings that include the Italian Alps, India, Spain, and Mexico.
History is being made here, folks. So with all that cash outlay, you'd think Team Citadel could afford a more original story. This one seems oddly similar to "The Long Kiss Goodnight," an underrated 1996 thriller starring Geena Davis as a schoolteacher who can't remember her years as a super spy until she rediscovers her knack for killing bad guys without mercy.
"Citadel" doubles up on the amnesia angle. This time, both Madden, as elite agent Mason Kane, and Chopra Jonas, as his partner and lover Nadia Sinh, have had their memories wiped for eight years while they live newly domesticated lives under new identities.
That's when their boss, Bernard Orlick (a terrific Stanley Tucci), shows up to remind them that they work for Citadel, a nonpartisan spy agency dedicated to world peace. He needs them now, because Manticore, a criminal consortium of eight global billionaire families brokered by Dahlia Archer (a deliciously evil Lesley Manville), wants Citadel destroyed for keeps.
Not likely. Mason, who's spent those eight years in small-town Oregon, coaching his daughter's Little League team, can't believe he's a spy. Neither can his wife Abby (Ashleigh Cummings) who sasses, "You can't remember to put up the toilet seat and now you're Jason Bourne?"
She's not wrong. Trust is the major issue driving half the "Citadel" episodes I've seen so far. Is anyone reliable? Not on this series, which is what keeps you stoked for whatever comes next.
Given that "Citadel" merely repurposes rusty spy tropes, the pressure is on the actors to bring humanity to the action fireworks. Scotland's Madden, 36, shows why he's a strong contender to be the next 007. And India's Chopra Jonas, 40, is a former Miss World, the wife of pop star Nick Jonas and a screen presence with the acting know-how to match her beauty. They're dynamos.
Is "Citadel" really worth the fortune it took to replace the original creative team and order costly reshoots with new showrunner David Weil, best known for the lousy "Hunters" series? My attitude is it's not my problem. Or yours. Let the suits worry about profits. All most of us want is an action mindblower that works us over. On that level, "Citadel" delivers the goods.